Old Flames
by screamingmapleleaf
Summary: Crime AU. Ivan and Gilbert are old flames. To get revenge for wrong doings in the past, Gilbert kidnaps Ivan's current love interest Matthew. What will happen if Gilbert and Mathew fall in love? What will happen when old feelings resurface?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I Don't own Hetalia.

**Author's Notes:** I've had this idea for a while now but I never had the time to write it out or whatever. Usually I'm busy doing one thing or another so I don't have a lot of time to update and whatnot. I'm still fairly new to this fic writing thing so I hope it doesn't suck too much. *sigh* This chapter will be written in Canada's point of view for the time being. This has been very difficult to write because I don't know how I should write them. A few pointers would be greatly appreciated.

Matthew = Canada

Ivan = Russia

Gilbert = Prussia

The first thing I noticed upon waking was the pain. There was a dull throbbing from the back of my head. I instinctively tried to reach back and touch the source of pain but found my arms restricted. I struggled with the restraints around the wrists. The material binding my wrists was rough and scratchy, I could feel it burning and rubbing against my skin. How did I end up like this? I looked around but it was so dark, the fabric covering my eyes didn't let a speck of light shine in. l felt panic rise inside me. I tried to call out for help but found my words were muffled. The fabric between my lips was chaffing my face as I bit into it. What's going on? Why am I here? Think Matthew, think!

I was becoming more aware of my surroundings as the fog cleared from my mind. I noticed the surface I was sitting on was hard, cold, and slightly wet. It was strangely quiet except for the occasional dripping sounds of water. I realized that I was sitting in a basement or cellar of some sort. But who brought me here? I can't remember how I got here. The last thing I remember was spending the night at Ivan's house... But then why am I here? Oh god! What if I'm about to die. Someone's trying to kill me! But why!? What have I done? I have to get out of here! I desperately yanked at what felt like rope around my wrists. I continued my little struggle but it was all in vain. There was no way I was getting out of here. Out of breath, I heavily sank to the ground in defeat. I felt tears of frustration well up but I didn't dare let them out. I could not let them know I was afraid. I refuse to let them have the sick pleasure of me crying and begging for mercy. I have to be strong. I'll figure- what was that?

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a door opening. My blood ran cold as I heard heavy footsteps descend the creaky stairs. Oh god! Oh god! Oh god! I want to go home! I want to wake up and this all be nothing but a dream. A nightmare, not reality, this can't really be happening. My ragged breathing increased with each step of the stairs until I could no longer hear them anymore. They're here. I'm going to die! I'll never get to see my family or friends again. Will they ever find me? My brother Al, Arthur, Francis... Ivan. I so desperately wanted to cry but I refused. What will my family say? What about Ivan...? I never got to say goodbye or tell them I loved them. I whimpered as I heard the killer approach me. This is it. This is really happening, I'm going to die...

My heart was pounding so harshly in my chest that I'm sure the killer could hear it too. I tried to flatten myself against the moist wall I was leaning against. I know it was no use and it gave me no peace of mind whatsoever but it was a reflex. I heard an amused chuckle from above as I tried to make myself smaller against the ground. "Aw don't be afraid little birdie. I don't bite... Well most of the time." I froze in place at the sound of the killer's voice. I felt myself tremble as he placed a hand under my chin to tilt my head up at him. I swallowed harshly as I tried to keep my breathing under control. The killer's other hand slipped behind my head and I winced in pain when his hand brushed the wound. A few seconds later the blindfold slipped from my face.

My eyes tried to adjust, but it was so dark. The only light came from the stairway. I was correct in my basement assumption so it seems. My eyes quickly darted around the room but then I remembered the killer in front of me. Slowly the dark shadow came into detail. The killer had white hair and dark red eyes. His skin was sickly pale and he looked like a ghost. This newfound knowledge did nothing to calm me down, in fact, I think I peed my pants.

Hysteria does weird things to people, at this point I was 100% sure ghost boy was going to rip my face off with his teeth and sacrifice my soul or something, I don't know. I just know that I was crying like a freaking baby right now, maple… "Hey, don't worry kid, I won't hurt you. I'm just doing business." Now that piqued my curiosity. "What kind of business." I asked as I looked him straight in the eye. Business? Kidnapping someone is doing business?

"Oh nothing much, just a little ransom to that Russian tightwad of yours. I think he'll pay a hefty price to get you back Birdie." I was a little shocked, what did Ivan have to do with this? "Ivan? But why?" My kidnapper crouched down, pulling on my restraints as he talked. "He just owes me a little something but don't worry, no harm will come to you. I'm sorry that you had to be dragged into this." Not sorry enough not to do it though… Sigh. "And who are you, if I may ask?" I was already bored with this whole situation and just wanted to go home. I was tired, wounded, and still a little frightened. But the guy wouldn't hurt me, he doesn't have the guts. I feel bad for Ivan though, getting dragged into this.

"And I thought you'd never ask! I'm the awesome Gilbert! Kesesese!" Oh no, I inflated his ego. He's pretty annoying with that obnoxious laugh of his. But still, if I wanted to get out of here, I'd have to play my cards right. "Well, my name's Matthew, it's a pleasure. I'd shake your hand but they seem to be unavailable at the moment," I said sourly. Maybe he would get the hint and untie me, eh? "Oh!" Gilbert suddenly exclaimed, standing up quickly. "I forgot to make a phone call, I'll be right back. Don't you go anywhere. Heh, what am I kidding, you won't." And with that said he raced back up the stairs leaving me here. Ugh! It's cold down here! That hoser should hurry up before my arms fall off, I can't feel them anymore.

Within a couple of minutes, I heard his footsteps approach again. And with a satisfied sigh, he pushed open the basement door. "Well, what did he say?" I asked, more than enough done with this crap. Gilbert looked up confused. "Who?" For the love of- "Ivan! I know you called him!" I swear I could hear him trying to think. "He didn't answer, I left a voicemail so we'll have to wait and see. For the meantime, lets get you cleaned up." I stiffened when he started to approach me.

"Still don't trust me, huh? Well that's okay." He reached behind me and loosened the restraints, the rope falling to the floor. I had a hard time standing up, sitting down a long time does that to you. As embarrassing as it was, I had to be carried up the stairs. He carried me up the basement stairs and through the house. "Nice place you got here." I said plainly, observing my surroundings. And what a nice place it was… THIS GUY WAS FREAKING RICH. He probably ate gold-plated sandwiches all day while swimming in a pool of money. Naturally, it seems that I'm the only one who gets it, being the delicate forest creature I was.

"Gold-plated sandwiches? Don't be ridiculous birdie. Do you know how hard that would be to ingest? It would probably give me constipation or something." Alright. EW. "And DON'T even get me started on the money pools. Been there, done that!" Why am I not surprised. As cool as his house was, I decided I don't care. What? Don't look at me like that. It's been a long day, being kidnapped and junk, but I'm tired so spare me the details. Maybe I'll describe the house in great detail tomorrow or something.

Upon hearing my intentionally loud yawning, kidnapper guy suggested we go to bed. Even though I still don't trust that guy, I was kind of grateful. I really didn't want to sleep on moldy cement so yeah… But what I didn't understand was why we had to SHARE a bed. I mean there must be like 2,000 luxury bedrooms in this place! I know I'm exaggerating, but why?! When I told nagged about this he proceeded to look at me like I grew antlers or something. "Well how do I know you won't try to escape?" Hmmm… He had a point. I actually hadn't thought about that. Kind of pathetic, I know, but my brain is like pudding right now. And if you don't mind, I'd actually like to get some sleep. With that in mind, I turned on my side of the bed to face the wall. I find this situation very awkward. But to my dismay, he scooted right up behind me and started cuddling me. Cuddling me! Like I was some kind of stuffed animal or security blanket. I felt my face heat up. Oh maple, this is so weird and embarrassing. How am I supposed to sleep now?


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Notes:** I'm going to try to update on a weekly basis. Emphasis on _try._ It's not going to be easy considering I have _two_ fics to update along with school, sports, etc. I have a hard time writing the characters and whatnot because of their diverse personalities so a few pointers would be much appreciated. I really appreciate all the people who took the time to read and review this fic, I'm really trying here. So I would like to thank everyone who is reading this.

It's been about 3 days since I've been kidnapped and I'm having a hard time adjusting to my new life here. I'm not allowed to leave the house until Ivan pays ransom for my freedom. I don't know what type of beef Gilbert's got against him but it's really worrying me. I'm making myself sick just thinking about it. I wonder how Gilbert managed to break into my house and drag me away in the first place. I also wonder what's going on back home. What does my family think? Are they looking for me? Heh, of course not. Your own brother can't even remember your name sometimes.

These thoughts aren't getting me anywhere and continue to make me feel low but its not like I can do anything about it. I can't go home to verify my thoughts and I'm under constant surveillance. I even have to ask to use the bathroom with Gilbert standing watch outside so I won't escape. I just hope someone would notice something. Maybe my papa Francis will, he is the only one who actually remembers me. Alfred and Arthur, though they mean well, are oblivious as hell. I have to scream to get their attention and also constantly remind them who I am. I-It's kind of sad really. Am I really that forgettable. I really hope Ivan will notice I'm gone, but I don't have to worry about him, I'm sure Gilbert called him. But what about Kumajirou? Crap! I almost forgot about him! Who will feed him and make sure he doesn't terrorize the town again!? That pesky bear's bound to cause trouble.

I thought about all of this while exploring my new surroundings, it's not like I can do anything else. Gilbert gave the ok and left me to my devices, he said something about doing paperwork and whatnot. I needed something to distract me from my fate and prevent my internal freakout. As I said before, the house was absolutely breathtaking. I could be a jerk and give you a vague-as-hell description but I know you are absolutely _dying_ on the inside to know. Well, starting off, the house is freaking HUGE! The house was mansion-sized and had high ceilings. The house was white and had marble columns adorning it along with a lavish garden surrounding the estate. I could go on and on about the house but I know next to nothing about architecture.

Okay, time for the inside of the house. The inside was, well, weird. The house had a bunch of antiques and knick knacks scattered around. It was different, but beautiful. My curiosity was roused just looking around. Walking around the cluttered sitting room, I discovered a variety of things. Gilbert collects strange things such as stamps, coins, rocks, and newspapers. He also has a lot of old dusty books. The bookshelf took up a whole wall! And weirdest of all, his bird obsession. He even has a bird room (What?).

This place isn't half bad, it's just kind of lonely here. I'm used to always having Kuma by my side. I don't think I've ever been without him. We went everywhere together. Even though airport security usually gives me hell for trying to take a polar bear on a plane (I have papers for him I swear!). I've never felt this lonely in my life, except maybe for the time Alfred forgot about me when we played hide and seek as children. I now hate that game with a passion. But that's besides the point. While Gilbert has been really nice to me and stuff, I don't trust him. I mean hello! HE KIDNAPPED ME!

I really hoped someone was looking for me. And if it was anyone, it would be Ivan. We've been together for the past 4 years. I wonder why Gilbert hates him. I mean he's the sweetest guy, kind of intimidating, but he's a real sweetheart. He never forgets about me and is always there when I need him. He's probably tearing up the town looking for me. I just feel really bad that he would have to pay my ransom, even if he's got dough. This was all my fault, letting myself get caught so easily. I was forced out of my thoughts when I heard a voice speak.

"Hey Matthew, dinner's ready," Gilbert said as he scared the living daylights out of me. After I let out a mighty shriek and just about fell over, I heard his obnoxious laughter fill the room.

"For the love of maple! You scared 10 years of my life away from me! You could have at least coughed or something to let me know you were there!"

Gosh golly, this guy. I gave him my most meanest glare, which by the way, wouldn't have scared a mouse. Don't look at me! I don't know! I'm trying here! When he finished cackling, he wiped a tear out of the corner of his eye.

"That was hilarious! You're pretty squeamish birdie. Well if you're done screaming, pancakes are waiting for me!"

And with that being said, he turned on his heel (not that he was wearing any of those) and walked out of the room while I sped up to catch up to him.

"Pancakes?" I asked as I shot him my most dazzling smile (cue heart attacks). He gave me a nod of the head as confirmation. Ooh goody! Pancakes are my absolute favorite. We entered the kitchen together and I got a good look around. Wow, a normal room. Gilbert made a gesture to the table on the other side of the room as he walked to retrieve the spoils of war from the counter (I know, I know, I'm a dork). I walked over and sat down in a random chair and watched from afar. Gilbert came to the table with plates full of pancakes (PANCAKES F-YEAH!) while he balanced the syrup bottle on the side. The took the seat across from me and set the plates down, sliding mine towards me.

"Hey what do you want to drink? I got oj, milk ,water…," Gilbert asked as he walked back to the fridge.

I contemplated whether I wanted orange juice or milk. "Hmm… oj please." I replied nonchalantly. As he rummaged through the fridge, I grabbed the bottle of maple syrup in front of me. What the- OH HELL NO! A FAKE!

"This is a disgrace!"

"Wha-?" My sudden outburst almost caused Gilbert to spill the juice when he jumped.

"The syrup," I said in a monotone voice. "The syrup isn't real maple." GOD, that was embarrassing! He gave me a freaked out look as he brought over the silverware and cups.

"Is that what this is all about?" He asked with a tone of disbelief as I nodded. I could already feel my self redden from head to toe. I'm so _embarrassing._ He just laughed it off and handed me my juice. In an attempt to hide my red cheeks, I hid behind my glass of oj. Pathetic right? I slowly sipped it and let it cool my nerves down.

"I apologize about my fake syrup. Usually it's just me here and I eat so much of this crap so I buy cheap," Gilbert said as he rubbed the back of his neck.

Heh, nice to know there are other people who appreciate the godsend that is maple syrup. But the other part of that sentence piqued my interest. And not the cheap syrup part (even though that enrages me so). I leaned on my elbows towards him.

"Why are you all alone here anyway, if you don't mind me asking."

Gilbert averted his eyes and hummed in response. I was just going to drop the subject seeing as he was uncomfortable with it. I mean he was actually wiggling around in his seat. But then he actually spoke. "I've been alone ever since I moved here to America on account of business. My little brother's still in Germany, still in school. I really wish I could be there for him, I'm the only family he's got. I really miss him and it makes me sad that all I can do for him is send him checks in the mail."

"O-oh, I'm sorry for asking, it's none of my business." I looked away to give him some privacy and picked up my fork. I started stuffing pancakes in my mouth (drowning in syrup of course). "Well," I started off hesitantly. "I have a family, two papas and a brother, but it might as well just be me. They never seem to remember my name or anything." I was starting to feel a little depressed. We both avoided eye contact and ate our pancakes in silence until I cleared my throat.

"I'm sorry for prying," I said looking up.

"No, it's fine… Anyway, on a brighter note, do you wanna play video games?" He asked with a mischievous grin as though nothing happened a minute ago.

"Sure" I responded as I eyed him warily. What is he up to? When he heard my statement, his eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas morning. He leaped out of his seat, knocking his chair over in the process, and grabbed my hand. I raced to keep up as he dragged me to the living room equipped with different video game consoles. He let go of my hand to grab his games grinning wildly. Strange enough, my hand still tingled from being held by his. He came back with a bunch of games. The only one I recognized was Mario Kart. Sad isn't it? I'm not much of a gamer, I'm more of a nature freak sorry.

"Mario Kart? Kinda lame but ok."

He agreed with little complaint seeing as I was embarrassed and flustered from my lack of gaming. In the meantime, he turned on the wii, handed me a controller, and armed the fort with snacks. Then the competition began…

"SHIT!" He barked out.

I just giggled. This was the 9th time I beat him, which was odd, I thought I would suck. I was still snickering on account of my most recent victory. We were playing the accursed Rainbow Road when I came up next to him and knocked him off the track. Pfft, he thought he had a chance! He only glared at me in response to my laughter. Popcorn and candy wrappers littered the battlefield along with soda bottles. We were about to start another cup when Gilbert's cell started ringing. I snorted when I recognized his ringtone.

"Stay With Me?"

"Don't judge!" He snapped as his cheeks reddened.

But our laughter fell short (not that it was tall to begin with) when we saw the caller ID.

Ivan.

**Author's Notes:** I know I'm horrible, I ended the chapter in such a crappy way. I made his ringtone Stay With Me by Sam Smith. I was kinda out of ideas. Well now that I cranked up the suspense, I must go! Tell me what you think of this chapter and anything I could do to make it better. Thanks for reading. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** I own Hetalia (just kidding).

**Author's Notes:** I'm back! I really want to stick to the weekly update thing so I'm trying. Even though I was out of ideas for Gil's ringtone for Ivan, I also chose that song for a reason. Kudos to people who get it. I apologize in advance for butchering the character's personalities and whatnot, I'm trying here. I would really appreciate some constructive criticism *nudge nudge wink wink*.

The calm and friendly atmosphere around us shattered, along with my composure. I may have looked calm and serene but on the inside I was a whirlwind of emotions. Ivan. Ivan is calling. Ivan. Is. Calling. Its been a couple of days, it's about time he called. I might be able to get out of here. I can go home! I'll see Ivan and my family again! Oh I missed them so much! I missed him so much!

I immediately halted in my weird little spaz-fest when I saw the look on Gilbert's face. And then I immediately felt bad. He looked so pale, and that's saying a lot. What I'm trying to say is that he was paler than usual, his eyes drooped a bit with dark circles forming beneath them. I was starting to become worried. He looked like he was going to be sick. But what scared me the most was his silence. Gilbert was in no way a quiet person. He was practically shouting everytime he talked... Well compared to me he was. That's why I was getting all fidgety.

I also felt bad because I was so eager to leave. I actually enjoyed my time here at Gilbert's house. Dare I say it, but I had _fun. _Gilbert was very kind and always tried to make me feel comfortable. We had movie marathons, played games, and had pancake-fests every morning. I like Gilbert, he's a cool guy and I feel like we could be great friends. I don't know, but I feel at home here. Which was weird, I shouldn't feel this way. We barely know each other. He _kidnapped_ me for god's sake! I should be trying to high-tail my tush out of here every second I get, not make pancakes with the guy!

I felt like Gilbert and I were friends, so I kind of grew attached to the guy. Maple, I'm so weird. Becoming best buddies with my kidnapper. If I'm being honest, I'm actually dreading returning home to my dull and boring life. Yeah I miss my family, friends, and boyfriend. I miss them _very_ much, they're my everything! But that's exactly the issue. I don't have a life outside of them. We met up and hung out and all, but the minute they leave, I'm all alone again. I-I'm a very forgettable person apparently. I don't see them all that often anymore actually. They sometimes forget me. Especially since I moved into my own apartment and wasn't constantly around them.

I always feel like the outsider. Always like I'm standing outside looking in the window, watching them spend time together, but they never see me because the window's too foggy. I d-don't even know what I'm trying to say! Forget it, forget everything! I'm fine. The only one who I feel understands me is Ivan. He's always there when they aren't and makes me feel better when I'm down. I don't know what I'd do without him. I trust him completely and would do anything for him.

Oh right, that brings me back to the present. Gilbert. The phone. Ivan. Oops, (cue face-eating blush of _shame_) I appear to have rambled. I keep doing that. During that whole ordeal (please pretend you didn't hear that) only 10 seconds have passed. Freaky right? Well since Gilbert was a frozen ghost-sicle (ghost-popsicle if you were wondering) on the floor, I naturally picked up the phone for him. What? It's _rude _to ignore calls like that and I am just trying to help out.

Oh what the hell, even _I _didn't believe me.

Ok! Ok! I just wanted to talk to Ivan, okay? I'm horrible and a liar, I know. Well I don't care, I'm shameless. So after taking a deep breath to calm myself, I pressed the 'answer' button on Gilbert's phone. I felt my heart hammer against my chest in anticipation. A few seconds passed before I heard his voice.

"H-Hello? Ivan?" I asked nervously into the receiver.

"Matthew?" Ivan asked with a tone of surprise.

I made a noise of affirmation and then there was silence. The silence was absolutely nerve-wracking. What's going on? Why is he so quiet? I-Isn't he glad to hear from me? I heard some frantic noises on the other end of the line. Then Ivan responded sounding nervous.

"Um, Mattie, I'm glad to hear you're okay. Is, um, is Gilbert there? It seems we have some issues to discuss."

I paused and thought over his words. His tone was quite edgy and nervous but was really bitter when he mentioned Gilbert. What? I'm really confused. He was acting really weird on the phone just now. What does he have against Gilbert? I wonder what happened between them that made them hate each other so much. Whenever I brought up Ivan in front of Gilbert his face twisted up in distaste. And Ivan just now, he sounded pretty ticked. I was shocked out of my musings when a cold hand slid the phone out from my own hand. I turned my head to see Gilbert raise the phone to his ear with a blank face.

"Ivan," Gilbert muttered into the phone in a cold tone.

"Yes?" Ivan answered back just as coldly.

I tried to keep track of the conversation between them, I wanted answers after all. But it was hard to hear Ivan on the other line. In an attempt to hear more, I slid up closer to Gilbert. I know it was pretty rude of me to eavesdrop, especially when Ivan obviously doesn't want me to hear. So now I _have_ to know what's going on.

I heard Gilbert and Ivan bickering on both sides of the line. Ivan muttered something to Gilbert which caused the latter to tense the phone a little tighter, Gilbert turned to me with a shocked and puzzled look on his face. I looked at him questioningly, wondering what the hell's going on and if he was okay. Soon his face twisted up in anger and he was about to fire off (I could tell). But then his expression softened when our eyes met.

"You should hear this too, considering you're involved," Gilbert said as he switched to speaker phone.

"Now that I have both of your attentions, I have thought over your 'offer' and came to a decision," Ivan stated in a clipped tone.

The room was silent. Nobody dared to even breathe, lest they miss what Ivan's answer. We were both on the edge of our seats (not literally though, sorry). _This is it_, I thought. I can go home. I felt relieved but sad in a way, but it was inevitable. Ivan will come for me and everything will go back to normal, or so I thought…

"I've decided to reject your offer," Ivan muttered apologetically.

What?

_What?_

A choked noise escaped my lips. _What?_ I asked myself over and over again. I was shocked, and so was Gilbert apparently. His jaw dropped and he didn't even bother closing it. But I didn't pay much mind to him. I kept thinking over Ivan's words. Why? I don't understand. This wasn't supposed to happen. Ivan was supposed to come for me! God, I felt so betrayed. Why didn't he pay the ransom? I know money isn't a problem for Ivan. He was also filthy rich, just like this jerk standing next to me. But if it's not money, then why? I thought he loved me! Was it all a lie? Was it something I did?

"Don't take it personally," Ivan said in a small voice.

I felt my eyes sting and my lower lip tremble. God, not now! Please don't start this now. Not in front of them! I forced myself to look away, at anything other than Gilbert and his stupid little phone. I settled on staring at my shoes like they were the most interesting thing in the world. Gilbert finally looked up at me and gave me a sympathetic look. Then he blew his top, snarling at Ivan.

"Hey asshole! What's that supposed to mean!? What do you mean you won't take him!?"

But Ivan didn't say anything… Not a word. He just hung up. H-He hung up! He rejected me and didn't even give a reason why! How could he do this to me! I felt a murderous rage bubble up inside of me, but I also felt suffocating sadness. And since Ivan wasn't here for me to take my anger out on, and my waterworks would probably freak out Gilbert (both were inconvenient actually), I settled for silence.

Gilbert must have noticed my internal freak out, because he came running over to me.

"Hey don't be like that. Don't bother yourself over that jerk, he isn't worth it."

I still avoided his eyes, continuing to stare at my feet. Eventually he got fed up with my hiding.

"Look at me," he said as he tilted my head up with his hand. "It's not your fault, it's my fault for dragging you 're free to leave whenever you want, you don't have to stay here anymore."

I didn't say anything, too overwhelmed with various feelings, I just gave him a flung my arms around him and let everything out. I was probably crying like a baby or something but I really didn't care. I just wanted to gome home and sleep for the next decade, I felt drained. I also wanted to kick, scream, and punch Ivan in the throat for being a jerk. I could tell Gilbert was trying to comfort me and that meant a lot to me. I was really upset and angry that Ivan just tossed me aside like I was nothing. But overall, I was just so grateful that Gilbert was here.

**Author's notes: I don't have a lot of time to write and update all the time so this is the best I can scrap up. I really didn't want to make Russia the bad guy (I hate when people do that) but I kind of had to for this plot. But he isn't such a bad guy, you'll see later on in the story. A few pointers are always appreciated, so I would like to know what you guy's think. Well thanks for reading this chapter and whatnot *internet hugs from a stranger*. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Hetalia.

**Author's Notes:** Hey guys, I'm sorry I didn't update but I really needed a break. I also wanted to work on the plot for this fic for a while now. It's about time it started to roll in. Well tell me what you think. Criticism is always appreciated.

* * *

Even after being told I could leave, I chose to stay. I don't know why I did, I must be losing my mind. I just didn't feel like returning home. After that little conversation with Ivan, I wasn't all too willing to go back yet. I know that's pretty irresponsible of me but I don't care. I just didn't feel like doing anything after Ivan stomped on my heart. I didn't want to face my family yet, at least not like this. And I _especially_ didn't want to run into Ivan.

I know it wouldn't do anyone any good if I returned home in this state. My family, although they would be relieved to know that I was safe and back at home, would worry. Especially Papa Francis and my brother Alfred. Francis would fret about me like a mother hen while Al would try to throttle whoever made me sad. I've seen it way too many times before. Arthur would be worried but would keep his distance as per usual, he's not really a touchy-feely kind of guy. I appreciate the fact that they care about me and would worry about me (if they remembered me), but I just didn't want that. I didn't want them to worry about me more than they have already.

I don't even know what I would do if I ran into Ivan. I was still emotional and angry. I wouldn't know what to say or how to feel. After all those years I spent with Ivan, I thought he loved me. I still can't believe how he could just toss me aside like I was nothing. Nothing but a burden, which I probably am. After everything we've been through together, I thought that he would at least give a shit about me.

I always felt different around Ivan. It always felt like he was the only one that understood, that even tried to put up with me. He was always there when I cried no matter how stupid it was. He always tried to make me feel better and reassure me that everything would be okay. Whether it be Francis's unintentional forgetfulness, a comment from my oblivious brother, or Arthur's bluntness, he would erase my doubts and tell me they didn't mean it. He always knew what to say to bring a smile to my face and vice versa. I don't know what I would do without him.

Part of me really hopes this was all a dream. A sick, disgusting dream. Only a dream, where I was never kidnapped, where I was still at home and Ivan still loved me. But that would only be self-delusion. Reality is that I really was kidnapped, Ivan didn't love me, and I was still being held here (of my own free will this time). And that brings me back to a very important question.

Why am I still here?

Why do I even want to stay?

The answer to these questions: I don't know. I _don't_ know why I'm still here. I _don't_ know why I want to stay. I guess it doesn't really matter right now. I know I wouldn't have to worry about my family, they had each other. And I know I wouldn't have to worry about Kuma, he knows how to feed himself. I will eventually return home, just not yet. Not while I'm still like this. I wouldn't even know what to say to my family or friends when I get back. I could just imagine the looks on their faces when I come back a mess.

I've been a wreck for the past few days. I know I'm worrying everyone, my family, friends and Gilbert. I don't want them to feel bad or worry about me, that isn't fair. But there's nothing I could do to stop it right now. I'm trying, I really am. Gilbert was kind enough to let me stay a little longer, even though I was free to leave. I really shouldn't be friends with Gil, he kidnapped me. If he never kidnapped me I wouldn't be in this situation. But I just couldn't be mean to him, he's too nice.

I think he understood how I felt so he tried his hardest to cheer me up. His attempts would be rewarded with a smile from me at times. For the past few days, he would wake up early and make me my favorite breakfast (which was pancakes of course) and then he would plan fun stuff for us to do during the day to distract me from the pain. He would even keep his distance when he saw I needed it. I really appreciated it.

I also found myself more curious about Gilbert than ever. I could tell he had been in a similar situation as I am. The way he reacts to certain things is interesting. Now that I think about it, this whole ordeal seemed pretty strange. What does Gilbert even do for a living? I've never seen him leave the manor-like house, at least I don't think I have. And how does he even know Ivan? Rich people connections? I don't think so. Why and how did Gilbert even capture me in the first place?

I found myself getting more and more confused as time went on. After breakfast, Gilbert shoved his hands into his pockets and said he had to get some work done and shut himself in his office. In the meantime, I was sitting in his library pondering until I gave myself a headache. The more I thought about it, the less it made sense. I don't remember much about the kidnapping and Gil never told me how he got in. I was at Ivan's house when I got kidnapped. What was Gilbert doing in Ivan's house?

Even though I became friends with Gilbert in the short time I was here, I didn't trust him. Obviously he's keeping secrets from me. I mean, how did he know about me and my relationship with Ivan? What's his relationship with Ivan? I previously pushed these questions to the back of my mind and shrugged it off. I thought it was better that I didn't know, but now I have to know.

With this in mind, I came up with an ingenious plan. When Gil leaves his study, I will sneak in and read all his secrets. I know that was shameful and wrong of me but where else was he hiding it? I already checked most of the other rooms in the house, I have no shame whatsoever. I felt a nagging voice in the back of my head telling me '_what if it's better not to know?'_ I shoved the troublesome thoughts away and exited the library.

I walked as stealthily as I could, trying to make as minimal noise as possible. I sneaked through the hallways listening carefully for any sounds that would have me caught. Even though I was trying to be silent I could still hear the soft squeaks of my sneakers against the polished wood floor. When I made it to the door of the study, I almost did a little victory dance. I'm surprised I managed to succeed because usually that never works. Al and I would play a game similar to this all the time to sneak up on Arthur and Francis but we never got far. I let out a little giggle at the memory of a pouting Al stomping his feet in an attempt to tiptoe along with Arthur's scandalized face.

My joy died down when I heard a voice on the other side of the door. I let out a silent gasp in surprise. He should be done by now! What's he even doing in there? It seems like he was muttering to himself or something (crazy, I know) but I couldn't tell because the door muffled his words. I let out a frustrated groan and rake my hand through my hair. I really wanted to know what he was talking about. I will find out, even if it kills me. Throwing all caution out the window, I slide up against the door, not even daring to breathe. With my ear against the door, I could hear him so much better. He in fact was talking to himself, which is really weird.

"Is _that_ was he was doing all day?"

I silenced myself so I wouldn't be heard and concentrated on listening. I could barely make out the words but I think I got a good idea of what he was saying. He's absolutely nuts.

"...Am I even doing? Why do I still feel this way, what's done is done. I'm just using him to get back at Ivan."

Wait. What? Did I hear that right? I have no idea what he was raving at in the beginning but it dawned on me that I was just a pawn in his twisted game to get back at Ivan. He wasn't my friend. He didn't give a shit about me! He's no different from Ivan! After deeming I heard enough, I grinded my teeth and turned on my heel to haul ass back home but apparently he wasn't done with his little rant yet.

"...He's just a ransom. Nothing more than a prisoner."

Gee, thanks. I continued worrying my lip until I tasted copper, wondering when he would finish shit-talking me. I'll admit it kind of hurt, but what do you expect? Even someone as nice as Gilbert would tired of me. I sighed internally and continued to listen because why the hell not?

"...He took him away from me. I should hate him. I should be cruel. I had no problem being cruel to anyone else. But with him I just cant-"

What the hell was that? By this point I fully zoned out, having been deemed I heard enough. I let out a shaky, uneased sigh. I was now confused now more than ever. I jolted as I heard shuffling on the other side of the door and ran down the hall. Damn these long, neverending hallways. Damn them to hell! I turned the corner just in time for the office door to swing open. I pressed myself flat against the wall and covered my mouth with my oversized sleeve to quiet my panting.

Just a second later, Gil exited the office while humming, leaving the opposite way. I let out a relieved sigh I didn't realize I was holding. Easing myself from the wall, I hesitantly peeked around the corner. Deeming it safe, I trudged down the hall and slipped into Gilbert's office that he was stupid enough to leave open. After closing the doors behind myself, I gave the room a once-over.

Everything in the room seemed pretty old and had a thick coating of dust on it. I found that pretty strange considering Gilbert spends a lot of time in here. I deeply inhaled the intoxicating smoky scent of wood and parchment. I made my way over to the big wooden desk in the middle of the room. The desk had papers scattered haphazardly all over its surface along with other office supplies that were attempted to be organized. I deemed the desk a good place to start and slid into the plush and cushiony office chair.

The pile on the desk was too much to dig through without him noticing so I started with the drawers. I slid each one open slowly as if expecting something to jump out but I found nothing of interest. Huh, how disappointing. There's got to be something worthwhile here. I was just about to give up until I slid my hand far back into the center drawer. It felt like a folder, sounds promising I guess. I slid it out to inspect if it was really worth my time. Gil could come back any minute and he won't take kindly to people snooping through his stuff.

With something akin to fear ablaze inside of me, I quickly ripped the folder open and cursing as I slightly ripped it. Oh maple! W-Well I got this far, no turning back now. The folder in my hand was one of those cheap paper ones with the tabs, you know what I'm talking about. I let my eyes graze the contents of the folder but not comprehending what I was reading (what a surprise!). It was a file, containing all kinds of information about… I-Ivan? Why does Gilbert have a file on Ivan?

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**Author's Notes:** Sorry to end the chapter here like this but I really wanted to get this posted. I lost a lot of time because of my little break so I wanted to put this up as soon as possible. I'll try to update again this week and hopefully get things back on track.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Notes:** Hey guys, I'm so sorry for my little unexpected hiatus. I had so much to do and it became too much with exams and crap so yeah… Once again, I'm sorry. I'm going to get this story back on track with the updates and I'll warn you guys next time I go on hiatus. But since exams are over and summer is here, I'll have more time to update.

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I bit my lip as I glanced over the file. _I shouldn't be doing this._ This is _so_ wrong. I repeat this over and over in my head. I decide to go through with it anyway. I mean I got this far didn't I? With a huff, I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear and pulled the file closer and began to read. I was a bit worried about what I was going to find. And it turns out, I had a good reason to worry.

Contained in the file was Ivan's personal information. Everything from addresses and phone numbers to daily routes and a detailed blueprint of his house. How the heck did he get all that? I wasn't surprised when I read all the addresses and phone numbers but I was a bit concerned when I found detailed descriptions of his daily routine, family and friends, along with all of his work information.

I glanced over at his work information and let my thumb fiddle with the edge of the file. My thumb rubbed against the smooth material of the file absentmindedly as I continued to read. I never knew where Ivan worked exactly. He told me he did small jobs here and there and he had a fairly high rank in the workplace. I just thought he was a businessman or lawyer, hence the huge house and junk but was surprised with what was on paper. Apparently Ivan was working with the underground. I looked around really quick to be absolutely sure I was alone before I folded and slipped the piece of paper into the pocket of my hoodie.

I felt a wave of nausea rise in me. If Ivan works in the underground, and Gilbert has all this information on him, then he must work in the underground too. These jobs that Gilbert and Ivan do are too dangerous, I don't approve of this. They could get hurt, maybe even die. It was suddenly hard to breathe. Even though Ivan stomped on my heart, I didn't want him to die. Even though I hate him and can never forgive him for what he has done, I still somewhat care about him. It totally makes sense, okay!? And I'll quietly ignore anyone who says otherwise. I didn't want Gilbert to die either. I only knew Gilbert for a short time but I've grown attached to him and I'd hate to see anything happen to him.

In the short time I knew Gilbert, I already became attached to him. I felt concerned for my new friend. I really didn't want to see him get hurt. It all suddenly made sense- _shut up, I'm slow okay? _-how Gilbert knew about me and was able to kidnap me without being caught. What he is doing is illegal. I don't want anything bad to happen to him. I really hoped I was wrong in my conclusion. I mean none of this was my business but it became my business when I was dragged into it. I once again felt my stomach drop when I realized something…

_I'm involved in this now. I am now involved in all this illegal mess and I am now in the middle of those two's rivalry. Why does this always happen to me?_

"Reading anything interesting Birdie?" I heard from right behind me. I could feel the warmth of his breath on the back of my neck. I jumped and let out a scream, dropping the file on the floor. Holy _freaking_ maple! Where the hell did he come from? I could only watch as all the papers spilled out of the folder and all over the floor. Well _shit._ My face flushed in embarrassment as I swiftly turned to face him.

"Digging through my things are you?" I was met with a raised brow. He looked a bit annoyed but he didn't say anything. I shifted in place nervously. I could literally feel the piece of paper in my pocket poke in to my side. Not knowing what to say, I looked down at my feet, anything to avoid eye contact. Eh, I really shouldn't have been looking through his things.. But when was he going to tell me about this? Was he ever going to tell me?

I suddenly felt my voice come back as I faced him head on. He looked a little freaked out by the sudden eye contact. I no longer felt guilty. Surprised? Well you shouldn't be. I guess living with Al has rubbed off on me. "I know I wasn't supposed to be digging around and I'm sorry but when were you ever going to tell me about this? About any of this? Why did you really kidnap me? I deserve an explanation."

It was his turn to look guilty, and he did. He let out a tired sigh and ran his hand through his hair. "Look Birdie, this isn't the time or place to talk about this-" I silenced him with a glare and crossed my arms. I was about to shoot off on him again for being unreasonable but he raised his hands up in defense. "Okay! Okay! I'll tell you but can we wait until after dinner?" Satisfied for now, I nodded in agreement.

We walked to the kitchen in silence. It wasn't one of the "comfortable" silences but an awkward one, really awkward. The tension was so thick you couldn't even cut it with a knife. I risked a glance at Gil. By the look on his face I could see he was very nervous about what he was going to tell me... Or maybe he was constipated or something and I was reading into it too much. The hell do I know?

Going down the stairs I could see his expression didn't change. He was frowning and his eyebrows were knitted together, he also looked a little paler than usual. God, he even looked like he was going to throw up. What he had to tell me couldn't be _that_ bad, right? Nevertheless, I didn't like seeing that tight frown on his scrunched up face. He wasn't supposed to be frowning, he was supposed to be smiling and laughing obnoxiously, making me smile along with him…

With that in mind, I reached over and grabbed his hand, lacing our fingers together. Hopefully this would calm him down and he wouldn't be as nervous. He didn't have to be afraid to tell me things, I wouldn't judge him. I felt him tense when I first touched his hand but he eventually relaxed. He even squeezed my hand in return. I could feel him sneaking sideways glances at me but I didn't look up. I could feel that my face was on fire from his unashamed staring. I mean come on, he was practically gawking at me!

When we entered the kitchen, I braved a glance at him while he wasn't looking, a smile present on his face. It made me feel warm inside that he was back to normal. I didn't like seeing him upset. He released my hand and gestured towards the table. I walked in without turning to look at him, slipping my hands into the pockets of my sweatshirt as I sat down. I leaned back into my seat as I watched Gilbert dash around the kitchen to set things up. I don't know why he won't let me help, considering I kind of live here now.

My thoughts were interrupted when a bowl of soup was placed in front of me. I had enough of a brain to look up and thank him as he also set out the cutlery. I observed the bowl in front of me which was filled with what looked like Borscht. I only knew what it was because of Ivan. But why did Gilbert make this? I shifted in my seat uncomfortably. I tend to do that a lot it seems. Out of everything he could have made, why this? Maybe I'm just overthinking this. It probably doesn't mean anything. I'm just overcomplicating things again.

He took the seat across from me and we started eating. Not that interesting, eh? We conversed here and there but nothing too interesting, we haven't even gotten to the "other" topic yet. I knew he was just making small talk to calm his nerves so I decided to play along so he would be more comfortable.

After we finished dinner, I rose up and gathered the dishes. I halted his protests and insisted on helping. I hated not being able to help and he looks like he needed it anyway. He gave in and handed me his bowl and silverware. I doubt he could even properly wash the plates in his state of mind. He went back to being nervous, which I didn't like, not at all. I could easily tell by the way he gnawed his lip or they way he gripped his chair.

While I walked to the sink to do the dishes, Gilbert bolted out of his chair and yelled out that he had an idea and ran towards the cellar. I gave him what I hoped was a questioning look but only received a smirk in return. Without another word he dashed down the cellar stairs. I only sighed and shook my head. Even though I was currently living with him, I still couldn't keep up with him.

While he was gone I refocused on the dishes. As I washed the dishes, soap bubbles slid down the front of the dishes. I rinsed and wiped the bowl in my hand as carefully as I could with a towel before I set it into the drying rack. After I finished the last dish, I wiped my hands off on the towel and sat in one of the empty seats. Gilbert was just walking up the cellar stairs when I sat down.

"Hey Birdie, why don't we have a drink or two out on the deck? Don't worry, I still plan to talk about what we discussed. You deserve to know just what I got you into." With the bottles in hand he walked down the hall. I followed not far behind, focusing on his crisp dress shirt as I walked along. We stepped outside onto the porch and made our way to the empty seats.

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**Author's Note:** Once again I am so sorry I couldn't update but I will try my best to be more consistent. I'm also sorry that this chapter was so short but I just wanted to get this chapter up. I will warn you guys when I go on hiatus, but it won't last long. I promise I'll update soon. And thank you to all the readers who didn't give up this story and are continuing to read it. Until next time...


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** Do I have to even do this anymore? Ugh, fine. I do NOT own Hetalia. There, are you happy now?

**Author's Notes: **Hey guys, I'm back! It's great to be back too, I really love this story and it hurt staying away so long. I've been taking extra classes so that's why I've been having a difficult time updating. It's been a painful few weeks. I mean it's summer break! Like WTH! I have school in like a month and my summer freaking flew by and it sucks. While everyone's chilling at the beach, I'm sitting in school. Ugh. So glad that's over. Well here's the next chapter.

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I sat in one of the empty rocking chairs on Gilbert's porch. I didn't want to get directly into the serious conversation we will no doubt be having right away. I think we both needed time to prepare for it. So for the time being, I just observed my surroundings while rocking back and forth peacefully. At first I looked around on Gil's porch. The chair I was currently occupying was white and old, the paint already peeling. Ah, this is so relaxing. I almost reminds me of home in a way. Gilbert's house was located in the woods. The stark, white house was a huge contrast to the familiar darkness of the woods.

The house was bright white and had a sweet musk to it, kind of like the smell of old books. I felt myself relax the more I breathed it in. I then went onto shamelessly staring at Gilbert. I have no idea what to say if he caught me and it would be very embarrassing but that didn't stop me. Gil was currently leaning against one of the porch rails, gazing into the woods calmly while sipping at his beer. I let my eyes sweep over him.

The black shirt he was wearing seemed to mold perfectly to his body, his muscles flexing under his shirt. Nice. I continued to gawk at him and then came to an observation. Gilbert seemed to blend into the house. I let out a snort of laughter. Damn, the house was almost as white as Gilbert. I mentally slapped myself. Stop that Matthew! That's mean! Even so, I couldn't hold back my snickers at my observation. Gil looked over his shoulder at me from where he was leaning on the rail. His look could be described as questioning.

"What's so funny?" I froze on the spot, feeling a wave of embarrassment flood over me. Smooth move, he heard you!

"Oh, nothing," I answered quickly and turned my head away. I even though I was looking away, I knew he was still staring at me. I could feel his eyes burn into my back. And yes, I know how weird that sounds. I knew he wasn't going to stop anytime soon so I just gave up and turned around.

"Oh, yeah? I knew you were watching me Birdie. See anything you like?" He spread his arms out and started flexing. He even went so far as to wiggle his eyebrows at me. Ugh. I should have known. Well since he was being obnoxious again, I guess it's time to break out the heavy stuff. I let out a disappointed sigh. Ah, boo. I wanted to sit here and relax a bit more too.

Deciding to break up the fun, I leaned back in my seat. "So what is it you were going to tell me?" I watched his shoulders slump and his expression change from teasing to serious. He cleared his throat with a cough and took the seat next to me. Right. What now?

"Well, what would you like to know first?" He asked timidly.

Hmmm. I thought about it for a second, well I have a ton of questions I want to ask. Better start with the easy ones first though. I looked off into the woods as I spoke. "Where are we exactly? I know we can't be too far." He must know what I'm hinting at, where he took me from, my family. I heard rustling in the trees and brush and I zeroed in on a doe and fawn feeding in the distance. The scene made me think of my family even more.

"I wonder if they even miss me," I mused mostly to myself, lifting the wineglass to my lips. I didn't even want to think about it. There's a big chance they didn't even notice. The thought hurt. Gilbert must of noticed the trembling in my voice because he wrapped his arms around my shoulders. I hate it when I get upset like this, I should be used to it by now.

I should be used to knowing that they would never care. That Arthur will never fully acknowledge me as family. That Alfred will never correctly remember my name, whether he's joking or not it still hurt. Kuma didn't even remember who I was! I raised him since he was a cub! But he still doesn't know who I am. What hurt the most was when I thought of Francis. Francis, my papa, who chose Arthur over me.

"Of course they would. Don't let yourself think otherwise."That startled me out of my thoughts. He gave a little squeeze before letting go and wiping my eyes. "We're still in New York, but we're farther up north." I noticed he tried to change the subject, which I was thankful for. I didn't even want to think about it. Or how my life was practically in ruins. My family not even caring I was gone, Ivan actually not giving a shit about me, and how I will probably lose my job for being gone so long. How will I even pay my bills? With just me working, I could barely afford my house as it is. I am really going to lose everything.

I could feel myself beginning to panic but Gilbert snapped my out of my thoughts by asking me questions. Like where are you from? What's your favorite thing to do? Got any pets? Favorite sports? I was really grateful that he even took the time to get to know me. Usually people just walked by me.

"I was born and raised in Canada with Papa before he met Arthur. I've never been back since," I admitted with an embarrassed blush. I felt a pang of sadness spread through me. I might never go back. I stared longingly into the woods. Trying to memorize every bit of it. I didn't consider that house in New York home. The house with Arthur, Francis, and Alfred. The ones wouldn't even give me the time of day.

"You know, we aren't that far from there. Just an hour's drive up north really. If you want, we can go." I felt the beginnings of a smile tug at my lips.

"You would love it there! I mean, how could you not?" I bet I sounded like an overexcited child as I rattled on about everything I love about my homeland. Time seemed to go by in a blink of an eye. Soon it was dusk and we were still outside. We continued to question each other about anything really. I learned a lot about Gilbert today than I thought I would. For instance, I learned that Gilbert moved here from Germany to take over his grandfather's work. He also had a pet bird named Gilbird (don't even get me started on that one) and a little brother still in Germany. He got a sad look in his eye as he was talking about his old home. I thought I was just imagining things because as soon as the look came, it left.

"I haven't seen him in nine years, but I call him when I can. I also send him whatever money I can, he needs it more than I do." Gil was well on his second or third beer. And frankly, he looked like a wreck. He let out a sniffle. "I left him all on his own," he whispered, to himself probably. I felt bad for him and wanted him to feel better so I took his mug from him and set it down. Then I gathered both his hands in mine, rubbing my thumbs on the back of his hand.

"If you feel that way, why don't you go see him," I muttered softly.

"And then what?" He let out a bitter laugh. "What am I supposed to say to him? After I left him there on his own for all those years? He wouldn't want anything to do with me. I already tried to get him to come over here but he's apparently going to college. He doesn't want anything to do with me." There was an uncomfortable pause as he took in a shaky, deep breath. "I already missed so much of his life. He probably resents me for it."

I couldn't take it anymore. I pulled him into my arms and refused to let him go. I didn't want to see him cry. I felt so helpless that I could do nothing to help him. "Birdie?" He whispered quietly. I didn't answer him, instead I shushed him and smoothed the hair at the back of his head.

"It's going to be okay Gilbert. If you miss him so much, just invite him down again. I'm pretty sure it's summer break so he should have time to visit between school. Just give it a shot." He nodded into my shoulder. I slowly released him seeing as he was better now. I realized we went _way_ off track during all that. We still haven't even talked about the underground crap! And it was too dark and cold outside to stay here anymore. He seemed to be thinking the same thing because he started to stand up and gathering the glasses. I helped him carry them to the kitchen and leave them in the sink for later.

He then took my hand and led me upstairs. His hand was soft and warm and seemed to fit perfectly between mine. And I know I sound like a freaking weirdo but it was just an observation, it doesn't m-mean anything! I must have been lost in thought or something because i didn't even notice we entered his study until he shut the doors behind us.

The sweet scent from earlier was stronger here and immediately put my mind at ease. This was by far my most favorite room. There were massive bookcases extending to the ceiling, filled to the brim with books of anything you could think of. Maps also covered the walls along with scrolls. The mahogany furniture decorating the room was only icing on the cake. It was absolutely breathtaking. I've been here for about two weeks but I was still awed by this room.

Gilbert sat at his desk, pushing the papers to the side to make room. The only other chair in the room was the one across from Gilbert and the desk. I sank into the seat and it's soft leather. I felt like an employee being scolded by his boss. That's probably what it looked like too… Anyway. I listened as Gilbert rattled on about his job and what that entails.

What I've got from it was this: His grandfather was the head of the family "business" before he died, leaving Gilbert who was the eldest, in charge. From what I know, a lot of money is promised from this "business." And Gilbert's grandfather was their guardian and was the one who took care of him and his brother between visits. Not only that, but he was also one of their only living relatives. With Gil's grandfather out of the picture, they had no money, no family, and no way to make a living. So Gil had to take the job to take care of him and his brother. Even if that meant he had to leave his family, home, and any chance he had to live a normal life.

This line of work is very dangerous and risky, I know that much. His grandfather probably died during one of these jobs. Gilbert never said it but he had a haunted look in his eyes. Just thinking about it made me sick. He could very easily die on these little missions if he isn't careful.

"I'm so sorry Mattie." Huh? His statement pulled me from my thoughts. "I got you involved and I put you at risk, and you are still at risk right now." He looked genuinely upset. Wow. I don't know what to say. I thought about what he just said. I was surprised to find that I didn't even care. I really didn't care that I was in danger. Living on the edge I guess? Eh. Well even though I didn't mind being in danger, that doesn't mean I approve of Gilbert's lifestyle. I know it isn't any of my business but I'm just worried about him.

A shrill ring brought us back to the present. With an annoyed groan, Gilbert pulled his phone from his pocket and stared fixedly at the caller ID. He finally decided to answer it. I opened my mouth to ask who it was but then he shushed rude! Well whatever, I guess I could wait…

Within five minutes he wrapped up his phone call and hung up. I fidgeted in my seat, curious to know who it was. I think he could also tell as well because he rose from his seat, pocketing his phone. _Where is he going?_ He told me he had something to do and was getting ready to leave. But I stopped him before he could escape by tugging on his arm, making him turn to face me.

"I got to go Birdie, I have another job to do." Wait-What?

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**Author's Notes:** I'm putting this chapter up early because I might not have another opportunity to do so. I might not be able to update next week so I want to put this up now, I apologize in advance for that guys. Criticism is always welcome and if you have any ideas, I would love to hear them. Thanks for reading this chapter, until next time guys...


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